Posted in English, Thought/Story

When the heart changes

bleebloob, this & that, shanti1507, susanti1507, divorce, marriage, cheating, cheated on, selingkuh, perceraian, pernikahan, perkawinan, relationship, marriage, love, heart broken

Every couple is unique. Sometimes we see couples who are so different each other, in a lot of ways, could survive in their marriage to last.  But, many couples, as we look them as perfect couples fail in their marriage. Ironically, some of them have known their couple for many years before they settled down, but only stay in marriage life for short time. We as other people, could only wonder and ask question “how can one couple success, while others who we see as a perfect one fail?”

It is the same question I have when someone I know got divorced because her husband wanted to. She is a young lady who has a good job, a good personality, good looking and independent. She grew up as a strong person, independent as she almost can do anything by herself. Attractive not only physically but also spiritually. But, what we can do as a woman when our man started to cheat, not only with one woman, then said that he was not happy with the life he shared with, and wanted to end the marriage? Should we insist to keep the marriage on? Try to convince with all kind of possible reasons that could make him changing his mind? Is there any guarantee that he will not cheat again, if he agrees to not end the marriage? When a man changes his heart and decides to go, what else can we do, except to let him go? The years that have gone, so wasted. Thought that we knew the person who lived with us for many years. Thought that he would truly love us, care for us and never hurt us. How could we anticipate for people who change their heart? We can not control how people feel about us. When love is gone, it is only that person himself/herself who can make it to come back, if he/she wants to. Still, to be cheated on is a painful and heartbreaking. Got divorced is giving you traumatic experience and may change the way you think about other people. But, when it has to happen, there is nothing else we can do, but accept it. Let the painful experience be the most valuable lesson in this life. Let that grief makes you stronger, to prepare the better life to come, as I do believe that it will come eventually.

Note: “dedicated to my dearest friend and all women and men who are facing the same experience as above story”.

 

 

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Posted in English, Thought/Story

Some Things are Worse than Divorce

worse than divorce, broken marriage, broken trust, relationship, this & that, bleebloob

Some things are worse than divorce. Divorce can be devastating and many people struggle greatly with making this decision. But if you have tried to heal your relationship to no avail, there are many things worse than getting divorce: 

  • Being emotionally and physically abused is worse
  • Staying in relation with the one you do not love is worse
  • Accepting less than you deserve is worse
  • Being lied to or cheated on is worse
  • Being in relationship because you do not want to alone is worse
  • Pretending you are ok when you are not is worse

Getting a divorce or leaving a broken relationship is painful, but you are deserve to be happy.

I just read that on My Simple Reminders Instagram account and can’t help to share it here.

I am not sure if most people would agree with all those statements, but to me the first one is definitely good reason for people to leave an unhealthy relationship. Many couples stay in unbalance or broken relationship for many reasons, could be religion, children, love, etc. Many people strangely still love and forgive their couple after being cheated on. It’s not our right to question their decision, but abusive/violence is intolerable. Any thought? Welcome to leave any comment below.